El Ro’i: The God Who Sees
Celebrating the 1st Anniversary of this website!
Genesis 16:13
Hagar asked herself, “Have I really seen God and lived to tell about it?” So she called the Lord, who had spoken to her, “A God Who Sees.”
I went for a walk in the park because I enjoy walking by the river. The park affords me a different view from my normally solitary landlocked trails. Thanks to the park’s popular riverfront it is quite a busy hive of activity. I turned to stroll across the bridge and on the other side I was met with scantily clad young girls laying in the sun in less than bikinis. Feeling saddened by their immodesty, I returned back across the bridge. I wondered to myself, why?
Why did you come to a public space to layout when you could do that privately?
Heading back to my truck, I had to walk away from the river. Here I noticed a woman dressed in a costume, performing her version of sword tai chi. She wasn’t there for the river view, because she was positioned away from the view and she wasn’t performing movements that required a lot of space. So again, I wondered why? Why did you come to a public space to perform what you could do at home? I wasn’t condemning any of them, just curious. Can it be because we all have this innate desire to be seen and seek external validation, a need to seek approval or affirmation from others?
Mark Leary, professor emeritus of psychology and neuroscience at Duke University says, “Even in modern society, people need to feel valued, accepted, and recognized by others. Validation does just that: It’s the corroboration of someone’s existence, that their feelings and behaviors are real and normal, and research suggests it helps minimize negative emotions.”
As I celebrate the first anniversary of my official Momentz With Mary website,
I think of my own walk with external validation. At first, when I had budgeted advertising and posting dollars, it was fun to see the likes, the loves, the shares. Yet, when my budget income did not meet my budget out flow, I had to stop boosting. Without the boost, I felt like one or two likes was no longer worth the effort. I questioned why I had even started this in the first place. Instead of being committed to spreading the Word, I had become addicted to the response. Come to find out, external validation is just as addicting as drugs or alcohol!
Dr Olly Alexander Branford MD MBBS MA PhD states, “External validation addiction underpins many mental illnesses and addictions. The causes, consequences, and recovery processes of the various types of addiction that are encompassed by external validation addiction are all the same.
They may be deadly.”
In my case, gratefully, my husband gently reminded me, “The person that needed that Word might not be a person that hit the like button. You don’t know, but God does. Just keep on doing what you do.”
How true he was!
God, El Ro’i: The God Who Sees,
knows what I am doing and doing His will is all the validation I need! All alone, Egyptian slave, servant to then barren Sarah, Hagar has an encounter with God. This mistreated mother of Ishmael, had run away in humiliation to a certain death in the wilderness, but God saw her plight and told her to return to Sarah.
Genesis 16:13 Hagar asked herself, “Have I really seen God and lived to tell about it?” So she called the Lord, who had spoken to her, “A God Who Sees.”
Hagar does return and then ultimately is sent back into exile by Sarah, but God again sends a rescue for her. God saw her in her private struggles, and in her public exile. She could not have known that God had plans for her son to become the leader of a great nation and Hagar would be forever linked with the history of the nation Israel. (Genesis 16, 21)
The same is true for all of us. We know so little of the plans God has for us. We feel small, unseen, unheard, and alone which leads us to seek out human attention. Yet in reality, God hears, God sees, and God is always with us. So, while it’s not wrong to want a pat on the back here and there, living in the vicious cycle of external validation addiction blocks you from living in the fullness that God has planned for you. Seeking to be in the Will of God can break that cycle. It truly is how He feels about you that matters, and He has already said, “I see you,” (2 Chronicles 16:9 ) and “I love you forever.” (1 Chronicles 16:34)
